Friday, February 26, 2010

Signs Of A Toxic Relationship

Diagnosing a toxic relationship is a very brave step to take, and sometimes it will mean having to leave your relationship permanently if you discover that all the signs of a toxic relationship apply to you and your partner. This can be a very upsetting time as you may feel that you still love your partner and that your partner loves you.

So what are the signs of a toxic relationship? Well if you are reading this article there are obviously some areas of your relationship that you are feeling uncomfortable or down-right miserable about. Maybe some aspects of your relationship are a little scary to you, this is a definite sign that your relationship could be unhealthy, but not necessarily toxic. A few basic pointers of toxicity in a relationship are:-

1) Your partner tries to show you up and make you feel small around other people. Now this may be exhibited under the guise of humour and others may not realise how demeaning your partner is actually being (if they are). The real clue here is whether you are able to discuss this with your partner when you are alone, and if your partner actually feels regret for making you feel undermined and unhappy.

However, If your partner realises that putting you down is not actually funny and can make a committed decision to treat you better in the future because they love you and would never want to hurt you, you may well just have a partner who is 'thoughtless' in certain ways which isn't necessarily a sign of a toxic relationship.

2) More signs of a toxic relationship are that your partner is very controlling of you. Maybe they want to 'manage' your finances by taking them over completely. Now this is ok if you loathe dealing with these things and feel very happy about your partner 'offering' to carry this burden for you. But if you feel as though you have no choice and are concerned about raising this issue with your partner then there are definitely signs of a toxic relationship.

3) Other forms of control can be signs of a toxic relationship, such as your partner makes arrangements for you in your absence and insists that you should honour them and you feel as though you have to do what your partner says. Or your partner feel as though they can do whatever they want, whenever they want but you must do what they say. Also when you have a personal arrangement with a friend or even an appointment, your partner turns up out of the blue, for no apparent reason - checking that you are where you said you would be. These are sure signs of a toxic relationship and they should be taken seriously.

Before I carry on with examples of the signs of a toxic relationship I would like to quickly say..... If you are reading this article because you feel seriously overwhelmed in your relationship, if you feel threatened either physically, emotionally of psychologically or you feel that your children may be at risk within your relationship please seek outside 'physical' help, don't wait to find your answer in my 'signs of a toxic relationship' articles.

If your are experiencing any of the feelings I have just mentioned these are all unquestionable signs of a toxic relationship and you should remove yourself from it as efficiently as you can and turn to trusted friends and family for advice.

Many associations are qualified to assist people in these situations. You can easily check on-line for telephone numbers and addresses of centres close to your location and just explain that there are definite signs of a toxic relationship with your home and you will be offered help.

For more advice on this and related subjects go to: http://savemyrelationshiprules.com

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